This is Postpartum?| 3(ish) Week Update

11-7-19

This is postpartum.

Today’s my wedding anniversary. I’m not able to even go to a mediocre restaurant to celebrate. I’ve went out a few times in the past week and ended up paying for it so I’m done with that.

Currently I’m 2 1/2 weeks out. I thought I would at least be walking around and doing for myself at this point. I mean, I can do things on my own but my gosh is it painful. I’m in pain constantly. I would take labor over this. At least I got a break during labor in between contractions. This is constant bone pain in my pubic bone, and pain from the tears I had from where they took him out from me with forceps. I also had pushed for 5 hours and he was sitting on my pubic bone that entire time. I’m sure I also used every muscle and bone in my body during my natural labor as well. That last hour and a half I had an epidural was heaven. I wish I had one now. I have to take magnesium to make sure I don’t get backed up bc pressure from crap sitting in my colon also causes me more pain. But I have to be careful bc too much Mag and I will crap myself bc I have NO MUSCEL CONTROL down there. Baby is perfect and nurses so well, I’m so grateful bc if he wasn’t so good I’m sure I would be in a depressed state. Also I have a great support system from my parents and husband. Its no wonder we have such high rates of PPD. I know there has to be so many women who DON’T have support and who are suffering. I can’t even imagine doing this alone or having another kid to take care of on top of recovery.

I’m past the point of ice packs helping and tucks pads are pointless. I take Epsom salt baths daily and use dermaplast frequently with little relief. They gave me a weeks worth of Tylenol 3 after I called my midwife in tears after the first week. That helped but I’m off it now and only on OTC Tylenol and Ibuprofen. I sit on a heating pad that I’ve thrown over my boppy that I’ve used as a donut to take pressure off my lady parts when I’m sitting. I sleep in a recliner most nights. I find it ironic that I was so prepared for labor bc I thought that would be the hardest part. It wasn’t for me. Honestly even though I had to have a forceps delivery the rest was a cake walk compared to the aftermath. The 4th trimester. Not enough people talk about this and I’m not sure why! I pee on myself DAILY and that’s the easiest part of my day. I barely bled at all. I didn’t need Depends for all the blood, no, I needed the Depends for what they were meant for. Pee and poop. I wish I could remember what it was like to not have constant pain. Hormones definitely don’t help this situation. I’d like to add, I’m no wuss. I had natural labor and pushed for almost 5 hours of that without any pain meds. So understand when I say I’m hurting that it’s not a mild pain. I’m not writing this to scare anyone or to get sympathy, I’m writing it to hopefully warn a new mom of what could potentially be her postpartum situation. Even as an L&D nurse, I had no idea this would/could be harder than labor. I know there are many women who had great recovery and bounced back like it was nothing. But I am not that story unfortunately, and I hope to God you get the easy recovery. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy.

**addendum – after writing this I went in to see my midwife. She had a look and said everything looks great and is healing nicely. Sulcus tears are slow healing apparently. But they also are sending me to a specialist at Vandy since I’m also having bone pain.

Ugh.

Love you, Mean It

Neisha

[ the incontinent new mom ]

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63 COMMENTS

  • Raelynne

    This will be over soon but I know it is rough now. I ended up having to have a cesarean with my daughter and developed a horrible infection and had to be in isolation for a week without even being able to see my daughter. It was horrible and I almost didn’t make it but here we are 6 years later and she is the light of my life and it was so worth it! You will get through this.

  • Dgm

    Neisha… my last child was 10lbs 5 oz- 22 inches long and I am 5ft. I had a high forcep delivery – which actually dislocated my pubic bone into 2 pieces right down the middle – so one side of it was sitting up on top of the other. I am a speech path – so I had a physical therapist on my team at work and she was familiar with this issue – she was able to do some adjustments which actually put it back in place with little pain and immediate relief – I had been dealing with it for for 4 years – I couldn’t sit in a chair or a church pew for even 10 minutes – also had most of the other issues you were talking about.. see if you can find a PT or even a chiropractor that is knowledgeable and experienced in issues from birth! — the pain is almost intolerable!!!! Praying for you!! Keep searching – you will find the right person to help you!!!

  • DeAnn

    I love this entry. I facilitate postpartum support groups and we talk about the reality of motherhood. What you said in this entry is the raw truth. Your truth.
    I work so hard in my state (Arizona) to fill service gaps for our mamas. Healthcare providers need to jump on board and join organizations like Postpartum Support International. They provide a free helpline for any family member with support needs or questions. They even provide physicians, nurse practitioners, and midwives with information and medication guidance.
    I wish you well and adore your little family!

  • Suzan

    You’re honesty is refreshing. Praying for the three of you!

  • Cathy

    I am so sorry you are in such pain. Praying you soon find some relief.

  • Traci Midkiff

    Praying you get relief soon! You are right nobody prepares you for that.

  • Cindy

    I agree with a possible Chiro who deals in this, maybe cold laser therapy as well for quicker healing, stay strong little mama!

  • Natalie Dixon

    I have a friend that also had a delivery like this she was in pain for 6 months until she went to our chiropractor, he was able to help her it took several adjustments and they where painful but she was better after that. It’s worth a try just make sure it’s a good chiropractor. I wish you a speedy recovery and your little baby a is beautifully handsome, he looks so healthy.

  • patti

    You aren’t alone. I was a labour/delivery nurse as well but no one can prepare you for post partum, nor does anyone really discuss the difficulties. I ended up depressed (in retrospect) but ignored it as I was supposed to know how to deal with this. Sooo not what I expected. The pain will be shortlived and you will amazingly forget any problems you encountered. Relax and enjoy the babe…you have the benefit of no other babies to tend to. You “look” great, baby is beyond adorable, you have a loving husband and supportive family which is more than many have.

  • Marjan

    I understand what you are going through since I had pubic and tail bone pain through out my pregnancy with both my boys. I walked like a penguin with both of them and had to work some days from home since it was painful to sit. Not every pregnancy is easy. Just take it easy since your body has gone through major change and need time to heal. Warm baths do help ease the pain, but still take it easy as much as you can!

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